Just As Soon Laugh As Cry

I’m a one-eyed, half-blind fool-is-me

I’m at twenty percent capacity

And twenty percent does allow me

To see a tight and bright bikini!


Thought I’d be pushing up daisies by now

I’d already said “goodbye” to my friends

Quite a surprise to wake up this morning

Thought for sure, you know, this was the end


But I’m still here to see

A nice tight bikini!
 

All I Need Is You

Yours is the canvas that I paint on ‘til the end

Your fate blows in the whispering wind

Life is short, too short, tho it makes a never-ceasing din

Is this the beginning or the end?


All I need

All I need

All I need

Is you


The wind does howl Death, yeah, in a thunderous roar

Torn to tatters, my heart is sore

My brush is broken, and now there is nothing more

The fury of Hell slammed the door


All I need

All I need

All I need

Is you


Yours is the canvas that I paint on ‘til the end

Tell me: what was, what was my sin?

Damning With Faint Praise

O, me and the Lord, we had us a deal

Restore my sight, I’d sing His praises for real

He didn’t do that, but I am feelin’ just fine

Praise the Lord, you know, He stopped the decline


He stopped the decline

He stopped the decline

Praise the Lord, the healer of mankind

He stopped the decline


I fell in a well, was tumblin’ down

The Lord caught me before I hit ground

Looking thro tubes at what I can see

Praise the Lord, you know, I mean sincerely


He stopped the decline

He stopped the decline

Praise the Lord, the healer of mankind

He stopped the decline

Two Princes Of Darkness

:p Is it too late to get in on that vampire craze?

O, me and Dracula will suck

Life out of you

Capturing emotions with words

Is what I do


Dracula, you see, likes to chomp

Your juicy neck

Bad, bad boys, yes, we are, you know

From bloody Heck!
 

B.A.M.

October is B.A.M. -- Breast Awareness Month. Join me in a celebration, an awareness and appreciation of BIG bouncy Boobs! :p Now, I am well-aware of the devastation that Breast Cancer can cause, having lost a loved one [1] to that disease. But let's keep thangs positive. After all, NOTHING is more important in life than a happy healthy Breast!

Yes, I am incorrigible.... :p

Sellin' Pencils On The Dock Of The Bay

Sellin’ pencils on the dock of the bay

Listening to the tide slip away


I was lead to the dock of the bay

Told to sit down and sit all day


There are no plans for tomorrow

I’m just waiting, waiting to go


There are no plans that I can see

Death has already overtaken me


Sellin’ pencils on the dock of the bay

Listening to the tide slip away


* whistlin’ *


(a coda, when I’m in the mood)


Hittin’ on girls who offer to help me

There’s more than ‘nuff that I can see


The sun does splash, the ‘gulls do say

Sellin’ pencils on the dock of the bay

BIBLICAL NEWS

The Book Of Hillary (which was kept out of the Bible by men for obvious reasons):

In the beginning, God created woman in her own image. And she saw that it was good.

God decided woman needed a dumb brute for a companion to do the heavy lifting. That is where man come from.

The problem is, man is so dumb that he thinks he’s in charge.

P.S.: Did God dangle a preposition or did a man screw up the translation?